Monday, November 23, 2009

Road RAAAAGGGEEE

1. People who don't use their indicators
2. People who can't use round-a-bouts
3. People who drive right up my arse
4. People who think that stopping at "STOP" signs is optional
5. Pedestrians who wander out (and dawdle accross) into traffic

Inconsiderate WANKERS

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Lollypop Bobble-headed stick thins

That fact that most women have an askewed self image aside, If i hear ONE MORE rake thin bobble head complaining "oooh, I'm soooo fat" " does my bum look big in this?" even "i'm having a fat day" I'll be dragging their sorry arses straight into the nearest Maccas, Hungry Jacks, KFC etc and ramming a SUPER SIZED meal down their lollypop stick necks.


Kay?


No more wingeing

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Is it just me.....

Or is it ok to laugh when "things happen" to not very nice people?

Monday, November 16, 2009

The ladies at Vinnies think I'm Crazy

But i don't care. If i want to wear a 2nd have pajama camisole as a top because i like the feel of the fabric. I will. And if i try on mens trousers because i want pants that fit a certain way. Thats OK.
Youre getting money out of the "crazy lady" anyway, so what do you care?
That said, I do love Vinnies, and Op-Shops in general for that matter.

Dear Self....

PLEASE do not go to bed with wet, freshly washed hair.
You will wake up looking like Chewbacca.

Seriously, don't do it.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Is it just me...

Or do the dogs bark all night long when you really need your sleep?

Noisey Bastards

Friday, November 6, 2009

Introducing Heyta

I don't often mention Heyta, let alone introduce anyone to her, however, as previously discussed, THERE'S NO ONE HERE. so, i do what I want.

Have you ever seen those old Donald Duck cartoon where he has an angel donald on one shoulder and a devil donald on the other?

Heyta is the devil.

I like to think of myself as a reasonable, generous, kind - if slightly *different* person.

Heyta is in short, a nasty, mean, cruel,crazy, manipulitve slut.

No, I don't hear voices, no i don't think she's real.

Everyone has a side of their personality that they "contain" their dark side so to speak, mine just happens to have a name.

See, as a small child , I was prone to having MASSIVE temper tamtrums. Heyta was my "invisible friend" - she got the blame when things were broken, missing or nasty missives were written to family members.

Now, everytime I have an uncharacteristicly mean thought, or the urge to do something "improper" or experiance an unrealistic amount of attraction to any man that isn't my husband. I blame Heyta.

Luckily, I also have a fair amount of self control - not obviously so to other people, but if they only knew right?